Eight Years

11:21am.

For most of you out there in the world, that time means little to you.  It’s just another pass of the minute hand through the doldrums of the days and nights.  For some of us, it means so much more.  At 11:21am Littleton Colorado and Columbine High School became forever seared into history and memory as two destructive boys derailed the day with the first shots that would echo even eight years later.

Every year I quietly make my way to the memorial where Rachel Scott and Corey Depooter are buried and 13 black stone crosses honor those the community lost those eight years ago.  Each year I hope the feelings and pain will fade.  This is a false hope.  The scars and wounds from that day in my sophomore year simply will not allow themselves to be buried.

The only way I’ve found to help my hurt is to talk about it when people ask.  It is the most cathartic thing to speak about the events of the day and the emotions we all experienced in Littleton.  People outside our city sometimes don’t understand or see what such an event has done to our hearts.  My goal in talking to those who ask is to simply do what I can to share what happened that day and somehow find healing through it.

It will be eight years on the 20th.  I know that day won’t be easy for me.  I cannot begin to imagine how much harder this day can be for those closest to the memories.  We all deal in different ways.  I just pray that as the years go on we all each find a way to process these feelings and scars in a positive light.

This year I will be doing a radio show that evening.  I’m still going back and forth on whether I want to seek out the families and friends closest to the tragedy.  I’ll update the Rocky Mountain post above when I have decided.

I’m sure I’ll have more to write as the days go on.

Please don’t forget Columbine.